i'm a wreck.
ten months sitting here trying so fucking hard to stay sober all down the fucking drain in bottles of shitty red wine.
i have no idea what i'm doing.
everything wrong and all my sadness is turning from something that affects me in days and weeks and months into years and no matter how hard i try to make it stop, no matter long i stay clean or sober, it always comes back. six years of cutting. three years of drinking. two and a half years of eating disorders. two years of painkillers.
somebody please just tell me that it's going to be okay someday. because i'm starting to lose faith in myself.
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